An Open Letter To Mr. Bhagat

www.chetanbhagat.com/2011/02/open-letter-to-sonia-gandhi/

Kind Patron,
After your frivolous attempt of trying to emote 'the youth of India' by writing an open letter to Mrs. Gandhi in the Sunday Times, I have realised how easy it is the write an 'open letter'. And thus I write to you with the juices of my veneral patriotism flowing.
It is heartening to know that a bollywood sellout with little or no sense of ground realities and a below average middle class take on India cares about us, i.e, the youth of India. No really, that a man with neither literary nor intellectual standing would bother to hijack the position of our representative is inspiring. That you took a thousand words to expound on how corruption is a big problem in India and how the Indian youth look up to the leadership of a Nehru descendant to make things better was ground-breaking. To emphasize on it enough I decided to take a bath in a tub, and eventually run out shouting Eureka. To my astonishment people thought I was mad. Of course I musn't be unfair. It is easy to criticize. It's nothing personal (besides of course that your novels were the three biggest mistakes of my academic life) it's just that I am sick of middle aged ex-corporate honchos dabbling in literature and attempting to take the position meant for the likes of MJ Akbar, Vinod Mehta and Tarun Tejpal. You see your monolithic idea of the youth of India, your colorless potrayal of their aspirations and your insipid choice of our saviour was so pathetically archaic that I was fascinated at the lightbulb that I saw after reading your article.
The youth of India sir, don't give a damn. About your column, the times of India, my letter or Mrs. Gandhi. They have realized that our romanticized ideas of Gandhism, Nehruvianism and Socialism have led them nowhere. They are basking in a self perpetuating apathy of survival further fed by substandard literature that on a scale of 10, I would not rate even five point something. It is this system of keeping the proletariat of India at subsistence level that leaves vast spaces in India's leading dailies open for non-sensical rhetoric like yours. It is this oatmeal media that has bred zombies for half a generation, and is now producing degenerates. The youth of India needs a reason to read editorials sir, and you are just not it. We need the flogging of a Mubarak, a Tianamen square, a Vietnam, a Watergate, a Prague Spring, a French Revolution topped off with no holds barred civil war for the youth of India to even realize where the faultlines they step on everyday lie. It is great to absolve the heiress' crimes for a greater good, or talk about an austerity drive, but of all things what the youth of India do not need is emasculated symbolism. For the sake of the blood sugar levels of the few who read editorials, the fewer who assimilate them and finally in the name of god, put down that pen soldier.

Sincerely Patronized,
Rishi Razdan.

Ps. Don't worry, the movies were worse than the books.